You are each represented by a lawyer, who negotiates on his or her own client’s behalf.

Benefits/Advantages of Traditional Representation:

• There are external standards
• The law may provide clear guidance on your rights (what you and your spouse or partner get or give up)
• There is a set timeline, with deadlines, which moves the case along and creates pressure and incentive to settle
• You can still stay out of court: the vast majority of divorcing and separating couples reach a negotiated agreement before a judge makes a decision
• There is a voice for each of you and you have the opportunity to have your story told to someone in authority
• In the absence of an agreement, the judge makes the decisions for you, usually putting an end to impasse
• Your spouse or partner can be compelled to act or refrain

Risks/Disadvantages of Traditional Representation:

• The law does not always provide clear, predictable, or objective answers
• Your spouse’s lawyer is not necessarily concerned about your welfare or your relationship with your spouse or partner
• Litigation usually takes more time than mediation or a collaborative divorce and typically costs more
• You and your spouse or partner may need to hire separate experts and evaluators rather than jointly retain them
• There is a win/lose mindset rather than a sense of working together
• Litigation is public and creates a permanent record
• There are court delays
• Your judge may not have any family law experience
• The process is lawyer-driven, rather than client-driven
• What a judge decides can be limited by:
  • the evidence (e.g., the judge has limited discretion)
  • the law (for example; a court can’t order child support for college costs); and
  • his or her own bias or life experiences
• if you do not settle, litigation is not a voluntary process; you have lost control of the outcome
• The pressure of a looming court dates and costs can result in unwise decisions
• Litigation is polarizing and typically damaging to your relationship and children